What Happens Post Divorce?

Rebuilding your life after divorce is a major undertaking for many people. Typically, change isn’t easy, and divorce demands many necessary changes in lifestyle. So, if you feel like you’re struggling post divorce, just know that many people find it difficult.

You’re making a transition from being dependent to independent. When you have children, your transition is also one of becoming a single parent. Your thoughts about living and your feelings are in the process of transforming as you enter a new stage of life.

You can view divorce as a new beginning. In fact, there are issues you can be mindful of that can help you do this.

Tips for Rebuilding Your Life After Divorce

Thriveglobal.com published an article by a certified life coach and mindfulness practitioner that you might find helpful. Highlights from article include:

  • Time. Expecting time to do the work of healing is not how you heal. You heal by changing your thoughts, making new decisions and then engaging in behavior based on your decisions. You are the one who moves on in life, based on your decision to do that.
  • Dating. Whether or not you are ready to date is an individual matter. Your ex-spouse may begin dating but their decision could very well be different than yours. It’s not a good idea to start dating just because someone else is. Nor should you date because somebody tells you it’s time for you to be dating. Get your new life in place and put your mind in order. When it’s time to meet new people, it will come naturally.
  • Your kids. Whether you realize it or not, you’re setting an example for your kids. They notice you. They hear what you say and see how you respond to various situations in life. That said, you will make mistakes and they will notice those too. But, the fact is: everyone makes mistakes because it’s part of life. What matters most is your honesty, your ability to apologize when you’re mistaken and your desire to correct what you’ve done wrong.
  • Yourself. As a single parent, you give up a lot to take care of your children. It’s very easy for life to become extremely imbalanced. It is also important to do things for yourself, create your own identity and have your own life. One day your children will grow up and go off on their own. At that point, you will also be on your own. Hopefully you’ll have invested enough time, thought and effort that you can find happiness and confidence within yourself.
  • Isolation. Needing time to regroup and regain presence of mind after divorce is normal. However, there comes a point when you need to start socializing. Get out and do things with friends, family or coworkers. Don’t get stuck in the loneliness of divorce.

Little & Logue focuses on divorce and family law issues and also helps clients with wills and probate matters.

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